So me, Jazmin, and my parents go to the ER thinking it will be easy. Just slash my finger, let it drain, give me a bandaid and let me go on my merry way. We had to wait quite a long time which was fine. Me and jaz, once I got a room, sat on the hospital bed together and talked for hours. We had so much to catch up on.

I had an xray done to see if there was foreign matter inside my finger. I had originally cut it in a kitchen accident (yeah, out of fury) and had it stiched up. My ring finger on my right hand was really bad. The insides were hanging out etc. I drove myself to the Anacortes ER, had it stiched, and came home. It had healed fine but got pretty banged up over the past couple months with all the packing. I was also under so much stress, I think my immune system had broken down quite a bit. I had lost a ton of weight and was really physically messed up at one point. The ER doctor thought that perhaps some gauze or something had been sewn up inside my finger and caused the infection.

Xray came back ok. You can’t really see much on there anyway so who really knows to this day. They didn’t want to lance it open, which was disappointing to me. Instead they gave me 4 different meds and insisted I start taking them immediately. My blood pressure was sky high. That was unusual because I’ve never had high blood pressure in my life, even through all I’ve been through. They explained that it was probably due to the pain. I have a very high pain tolerance but apparently that has nothing to do with it.

Additionally, I was starting to develop a fever, which isn’t a good thing. Bypassing the rest of the day which was me and Jaz enjoying our time together in many ways, I took the meds. I had to say a tearful goodbye to her at the end of the day and my parents took her back to Todd. Me and CPS had more appointments to follow up on but we were very close to being in the clear. I’m so grateful for that day. I not only had one of the best days of my life, Jazmin said it was the best birthday of her life.

The next day, after 3 doses of my meds, getting up during the night to take them at precise times as I started to feel worse by the hour, I started to go downhill fast. I got a pen and paper and started jotting down what I took, when I took it, what I ate, and how much water I was drinking. At one point, I couldn’t lift my head. I couldn’t reach the phone which was on the bed right in front of my face. I lay on my side and find myself drift into unconsiousness.

I awoke 2 hours later. My tounge was chewed up , bloodied, and I was drenched in sweat. I was no longer feverish. I burned such a high fever that it was clear that it broke. I felt wayyyy better. If I had not had 4 doses of antibiotics in me, I might have died. No one knew where I was. I had no phone numbers saved. I couldn’t move to call 911. It was so scary. I believe I had a seizure.

All those weeks that CPS urged me to stay home every day during business hours, I could have went to a doctor. I kept waiting and putting it off. I had no time to go. I had to just be tough. As a result, I almost died. My precious daughter saved my life that day, her birthday of 2008.

Since that day, the fever has started to come back several times. I’ve been in the ER 4 times. I’ve been lanced and wicked twice(They cut it open and put a long piece of gauze in there and then wrap it, allowing it to drain over several days time).

I currently go to therapy for it as it is grossly deformed and doesn’t work very good. I keep working it and massaging it, trying to get the flesh to gradually work back into its proper position.

It looks as if I have to go back again though. The top knuckle is becoming purple again and my finger bends backwards if I’m not careful as I type. I also will shreik in pain if I get poked by the edge of an envelope or anything like that. I have learned to do alot with my left hand over these past few months, especially reaching in my purse!

Thank you, Jazzy, for saving my life that day. I had a wonderful time and am so grateful. A finger is nothing compared to what we lost. I would give my right arm without blinking an eye just to have you, honey.

More CPS, state, and social security issues… but things start to look up.

To be continued……