I suppose it didn’t help when me and Doug were at a restaurant together the other day and got the surprise of our lives. A man that we both know walks up to us. I was on the phone with my cousin in Cali, Dawn. [The guy] knew her growing up too as he was neighbors with my Grandparents (RIP you two. I love you). So anyway, Doug is on the phone with her after he gets off and he’s getting all weird and waiting for Doug to get off the phone so he can “go jam tonight” and he was all riled up and laughin and trying to poke at him etc… I had to try and tell him to please be gentle. There’s something that just happened that you should know before you “go there” with Doug and get all in his face drunk and stupid.

Long story short, he was dumb enough to say what I’m guessing most people think. He said that I basically killed my own son and Hucks mom too because I got negative karma issues etc etc etc. Then he got in my face and Doug gets up asking what the heck was he saying. He bulldozed past me and threatened me that I had better not “jinx” him and his crew.

We never would have expected anything to come out of someone that we’ve known so long like that. But I dunno, we weren’t that close or anything so I didn’t know he was that big of an asshole. So after a while he comes back and asks me if he can apologize. I replied with, “For what, exactly?” He repeats, I repeat etc…. I’ll let someone apologize to me ONLY IF they can specify what the hell they are even sorry for. I don’t do empty promises, empty apologies, empty people….. no more. So anyway he turns to Doug, gives me the “talk to the hand” gesture, and says “Dude let’s go jam!” Doug’s like, “Do you REALLY THINK that either of us would CAUSE THIS?” He kept repeating to Doug, “Who cares, dude. Let’s go jam”… Doug keeps repeating the question, “Do you REALLY THINK THAT?” For God’s sakes, two boys lost the most prominent person in their lives. What a great friend for Doug to have anyway. One that doesn’t even THINK HE CARES about his sons future? One that thinks he wanted this… that I wanted this too?
It’s times like these I question my own sanity. But we get the most bizarre comments and things like that ALL the time.

One more person that we simply put on one of our two lists. The “YAY” team, and the “NAY” team…. He’s on the nay team now. He will get a nod, maximum, out of me. That is if I run into him again. Flat tire? Too bad. I got a spare. And I’m not giving it to you. Simple as that. No hate, no dwelling, just reminded that the world is truely a mystery to some people more than others.

So now I vented… and I walk away… water off a ducks ass.

But seriously, the question is…. Do people seriously BELIEVE IN BAD KARMA to that degree??? I still can’t sh*t a solid stool, let alone WILL someone to their death… just for kicks… just to watch two boys suffer like my son did? Like my daughter is? Like my stepson suffered? I actually think people DO believe that. I’m gradually tipping my toe into public again after 4 months of almost nothing. Lots of weird looks and all, but I’m seasoned enough to tell the difference just by the looks in their eyes.

People suck…. I’ll take time to post today about some people in our lives that have been priceless to us. They are on the “YAY” team through and through. Those seem to be the moments I cry most lately. At the beauty of loyalty and trust. Sincerity and grace. Friendship and understanding…. the qualities in people that are rarely found anymore it seems.

Just sorting this out in my mind today….