Let’s go back to April, which is when I was forced to stop writing and let’s see if I can catch everyone up on things.

Around the beginning of April, 11 months after Taylor’s death, I FINALLY get the courage and energy up to look at the last myspace account he was using. On the day of Taylors funeral, I had the exboyfriend (let’s just call him D as I don’t want his name on anything anymore) check Taylors account from my parents house. I couldn’t bare to look at it so he agreed to. He read through it all, saved the whole thing in a zip file, and emailed it to me so I could deal with it later. He skimmed it and said there was nothing disturbing in there. I believed him.

I logged in and read through all the messages. From April 4th 2007 and on, about two weeks worth, on a daily basis, he had been writing to a girl. They had romantic talk back and forth. She was really into him and he was really into her. Taylor did not share this info with me because he knew that I’d be pissed at him for being untrue to Chelsea. I had just paid thousands of dollars for my lawyer to defend him in the ongoing, unnecessary harassment orders that Chelseas parents kept putting on him. They had planned to be back together by her 18th birthday which was only 6 months away.

I proceed to check out the profile that was being used by a girl that was very attractive in the picture. To my shock and horror, the name used was Samantha NicHOLE from DouglASSville… the date the messages ending was ironically the date that her mother and other family members moved out of the house they all lived in, taking the computer and other things with them. The female who I’m speaking of, however, was D’s ex. She was going through alot of difficulty with their breakup and his moving on. She made a choice to use myspace to communicate with my son. I will never know the motives behind it as she is deceased now. I can only speculate that it was to gain info but she used the account to gain my sons trust by pretending to be a young girl that was interested in him and baring personal information and feelings towards her. He had no idea… I did see that he sent her a pic of himself in the very first message exchanged though.

Close to the end of the myspace interactions, they agreed to get on Xbox 360 to play games together and use the microphone adapter to communicate by voice while they played some video games. I remember this period of time vividly because he so desperately begged for the earpiece and I reluctantly gave in since he seemed to be enjoying himself while using his fairly new Xbox game system. This was the middle of April. I had bought the game system in March right after we moved in.

In the middle of April his depression and anxiety got progressively worse, to the point where he had an x-ray done at the hospital. He thought he had something wrong. He was ok other than his stress level was at an all time high. With Chelseas parents on him, and now falling for a girl online, his Xbox experiences were starting to become very intense and scary for him. The reason he was so scared, was because he was being threatened by friends of this original game user, Samantha NicHOLE.

It is my assumption is that this was the point where Samantha NicHOLE’s myspace account was no longer accessible to her. She (the adult Samantha, D’s ex) lived in the old house from the middle of April till the last day of April, when the lease was up. Everyone else moved out of the house. The Xbox communication was no longer her. It was taken over by family and/or friends.

After finding out the myspace communications in the April of 08, I ran into a friend who told me about the harassment from the Xbox. She overheard the guy way back after Taylor had died. He was feeling very bad because he found out my son had killed himself. He felt he had something to do with it. I was very confused as she went on to explain. Apparently him (no need to ever mention names as he knows who he is) and his friends (I will probably never know exactly who, nor does it matter anymore) were playing games with other people and making physical threats and being horribly abusive. He had no way of knowing, at the time, who was behind it. He only knew it was making the Xbox games pretty frightening, since he was already frightened for his safety with the problems he was already dealing with day to day.

I know it’s confusing and there’s still parts I don’t understand.

It is very sick and twisted why any individual would think that it’s FUNNY to torment kids that are simply on there to play interactive games. I have looked at the gaming forums and noticed the ongoing complaints from tons of users. The harassment level is so high, there’s almost no way out of it and no regulation in place. I did a bit of research on VOIP, voice over internet protocol, and there is no tracking of what anyone has said to one another on there. Microsoft, to my knowledge, has no record of the activities on their machine since its conception. That’s a lucky thing for some people out there, that’s for sure. Just another tool available for people to anonymously bully, threaten, and torment others.

Not knowing whether it was kids at school, the girlfriends parents, strangers, people we knew, poor Taylor was confused and stressed out. He just wanted to relax from the stress he was already under, and play his game. He couldn’t be left alone at all.

I hope to those of you who KNEW about this all year long, I finally found out. You all betrayed me. You all acted like you cared about me when all you cared about was covering your own asses as you watched me grieve. You watched the pain that I went through all year and still ongoing, with no regard for anything but yourselves. You were scared you’d be found out. Live with the guilt and carry on with your lives. I will be living with a pain that you will never ever understand.

Lucky for you, you will never get the justice you truly deserve because I can’t prove a thing. And even if I could, there are no laws in place, at this time. There’s something for you to be thankful for when you sit your sick, cruel asses down for Thanksgiving dinner. I won’t be having as nice of a time as you… My family has been destroyed.
Thanks alot…

**I had to write this part of the story to further understand the other portions I’ll be writing about. Like what started the bizarre journey we are on, what’s went on the past few months, and what our goals are for the future.

To be continued…